The First Post: Adventures In India

My first post. How exciting!

I'm blogging from Bangalore, India, 12.5 hours ahead of my beloved PST. I'm here for work.

It has been a sheltered adventure so far. Lots of time in the hotel and at work, a few excursions out into the buzz of Bangalore, a couple of walks through the slums and some absolutely spectacular food.

Here is a list of things that every non-Indian should know before going to India:

1. Driving is an experience - rhythmic chaos is the only way to describe it. The attitude is generally "let the other guy get out of the way". If a driver wants to merge into oncoming traffic, he just does it. Traffic lights and center white lines are mostly decorative. Lesson 1 in Indian driving school is learning to honk the horn. Two lanes is enough room for 3 cars and 3 motorcycles to drive comfortably side by side. Keep your hands inside your vehicle at all times or you'll lose them.
2. Don't use your left hand for much, certainly not to eat or shake hands. The left hand is the hand traditionally used by Indians to wipe their bottoms. Left handers have no place in this world.
3. A guy shouldn't shake a woman's hand unless she extends her hand.
4. The auto-rickshaw is a great way to get around - just make sure it has a digital meter and that it gets turned on. If I were a woman I'd probably arrange for an air-conditioned vehicle with a trusted driver.
5. All prices are negotiable, including hotels. Agree on fares up front.
6. Check online reviews of the hotels you're considering. For the past few days I've been staying at a 5-star hotel. Very nice. Except for the fact that it's adjacent to a river of sewage. It stinks.
7. Ask direct questions. Indians aren't so great at delivering bad news.  Don't ask "will this take long?" - you'll get the Indian head shake which is a side to side tilting of the head (neither a "nod" nor a "shake" in US terms) along with a "no sir, not long". Instead, ask "how long will this take?"
8. Don't penny pinch - your pennies can make a major impact on someone's life there. The average wage in India is a fraction of the average US wage. Consider that what you're paying for 1 night in a nice hotel is what the average Indian makes in 3 months.
9. No kissing in public. It's considered lewd and could get you in trouble.
10. Get out of the hotels and eat the Indian food among the Indians. It's absolutely delicious and you'll get some of the most hospitable service you've ever had.
11. Accept and embrace the differences. I went to dinner with some Hindu friends. I proclaimed my dinner of beer, garlic naan and chicken curry to be one of the best I've ever had. They laughed. Lots of Hindus don't drink alcohol. Garlic and onions are considered by many to be aphrodisiacs and thus not acceptable. And of course many Hindus are vegetarian. At a minimum, a Hindu cow is a safe cow.

I'm here for another 10 days or so. I'll venture off to Mysore before I leave. Then back to the US.